I’ve been there so often
I’ve lost my fear, gone, forgotten
The darkest abyss
Under a cobblestone crest
Opening into a gloomy manhole
Trapdoor to the soul
Below the floor
My elbows do score
Over dried out soil
Beneath sticky cobweb curtains
Fingernails claw my way
Toes pushing against crumbled clay
No space, dusty tears
No air, dirt I chew
Shouldering under bearers
Squeezing, I burst through
I’m here, there’s a job to do
I begin searching for you
Ivor Steven (c) 2018
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ivor20
G'day, and welcome to my blog site. My name is Ivor Steven, I live in Geelong, Australia. I'm an ex-industrial chemist, and a retired plumber, and a former Carer of my wife(Carole), for 30 years, who suffered from severe MS. I Write poetry about those personal thoughts, throughout and beyond my life as a Carer.
I've been blogging for over 2 years, and writing poems for 19 years. Of course a lot of my poems are about my favourite subject Carole, but since I've been blogging my writings have become quite varied, humourous, mystical, observational, and even a few monster/horror poems.
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Dusty tears. 💙 This was beautiful.
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Thank you Sameera, the poem is a mixture of the realities of working and crawling under a floor, with the surreal feeling of darkness when your loved one dies, and I’ve actually experienced these thoughts while laying under a floor working, and it’s emotionally a weird feeling….
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I understand Ivor. 🙂
I can feel pain in lines. From deepest loss comes the greatest poetry. ❤ Life is such and we need to embrace the way it is. 😉
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Yes, every word I write is piece of medicine for me ☺️
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Well done dear friend 💛
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Thank you Walt, a beautiful piece of music.
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Very poignant – so well expressed
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Thank you Derrick, It was an interesting write for me, inspire by a job of crawling under a house last week..
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Wow Ivor … this is really resonating with me. This is so powerful. Thanks so much for sharing xxx
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Thank you again, this poem contains a mixture of emotions for me, if you happen to read some of my other comments, it might help with what I try to express.
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Wonderful. Such tangible imagery, yet meanings can be found under the dust and cobwebs. Love that about your poetry.
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I’m pleased with this poem, and how I was to tie my imagery and emotions together,
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You did it masterfully ❤️
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I being searching for you
Fear can’t day I’ve ever
Experienced it
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The fear of being trapped in your emotions, and not being able to escape them. But I’m fine, I’ve been there so often.
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☺👍Good.
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Thank you ❤️
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This is so well written Ivor! I love it!
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I love it, when you say, I love it 😍
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Awwww 🌸
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Lovely work Ivor! I find confined spaces are not so welcome now, despite having been a cave guide in my younger days!
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I don’t like it either, the heart-rate goes up heaps, And I don’t seem to squeeze under as easily as I used to ??
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I think they must make crawl spaces smaller nowadays!
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You’re very kind Peter, haha
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Wow what a wonderful poem describing your job, I can honestly say I have never read anything quite like this about plumbing. You have a gift Ivor!
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I’ve a fear of getting stuck under the house, and I had a fear of losing Carole, so I tied them together in the poem, and actually to help when I’m feeling a bit panicky under the house, I think of Carole, …
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😊😊😊 that’s very sweet, I love hearing about your love for your wife.
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❤️❤️
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My first thought was I’ve been down that hole and crawled my way out!!
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I’m pleased you could relate to my words, and basically that’s what my poem is about 😊
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Well Ivor, like you I’ve been in some dark places – Fortunately never under the floor!
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As a plumber I’ve been there too often, 😊
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Our grief goes with us every where. This was a vivid combination of your grief and your ‘day to day’ that we can’t avoid.
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Fabulous Colleen, and that’s exactly what I was trying to capture, I’m so pleased you commented on this aspect of my poem xx
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I can imagine you working your every day, and being over come with grief, or thinking of it. Life doesn’t give us a pass for our grief does it Ivor?
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😊 there’s no free passes, but having lots of friends and family helps me through every day.
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That’s what we are all connected for. Share the joys and the sorrows.
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Thank you Colleen, you make me smile… xx
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😀
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Beautiful poem💕
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Thank you Tina.
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Your dark creative mind thrills me, Ivor! It’s a treat to enter your imagination and see the things you do while you work. Frickin’ awesome!!
PR
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Hehe, I was actually lying under the floor covered in dust and cobweds, and there I was thinking of Carole, Oh how the mind wanders !!
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Keep your mind wandering, my friend… I do like the bread crumbs you leave for me to follow! 😀
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You must watch out for the bower birds, they’ll eat my bread crumbs.
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Well done Ivor. My favorite lines, “No space, dusty tears
No air, dirt I chew”
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Thank you Ali, I’m so pleased you liked these two lines, I had a jumble of words trying to explain my confinement, and eventually I honed them down to these simplest of phrases, and I’m happy I captured the feeling. 😊
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OMG! Powerful! Loved this struggle! Man! I’m in ripples.
You’re such a poet sir! 😊😘
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I’m so pleased you felt the depth my struggle in my poem.
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This was awesome. As expected, dearest Ivor xxx
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Thank you ❤️ x dear lemon, I’m on the the boat now 😊😊
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🖤💚🖤💚
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